Make the Request Politely

You may signal politeness by framing the request as a question (Would you be willing to write me a letter of recommendation?) or by using polite words (Please fill out your expense report by Friday).

Provide a Justification for the Request, if Necessary

If you have a tight deadline, for example, you may explain why you weren’t able to provide more leeway. The point here is for you to think of any questions or objections your receiver may have and address them upfront.

Provide Details Your Receiver Needs to Complete the Request

For instance, if you are asking people to indicate their availability for a meeting, you might provide the options for the meeting. Or if you’re asking someone to write a reference letter for you, you should include the contact information for the person to whom the reference will be sent, the job description, and your current résumé.

Express Appreciation

Research shows that receivers are much more likely to offer help—and offer high quality help—when they feel appreciated (Grant, 2008). So make sure to say thank you. If it is a request that you are relatively sure the person will respond positively to, simply say “Thank you.” If it is a genuine request that your receiver may or may not agree to, you may want to end with something like, “thank you for considering my request,” which acknowledges that they have the right to say no. If it is a big request, you may want to express even more appreciation, as appropriate. For instance, “Thank you. Your support of my career really means a lot to me.”

Message Strategy: Delivering Bad News

Unfortunately, there will be many times in business when you must deliver bad news. Perhaps you need to let a customer know a product they ordered is no longer available. Perhaps you will need to deny someone a refund or a request for time off. You may have to let employees know their workload is going to increase (without additional pay) to cover for an employee who left the company.

Composing bad news messages is a much more challenging task than composing good news messages. Bad news messages can trigger a range of negative responses in your receiver—from disappointment to outright anger. Furthermore, receivers of bad news tend to be much more critical judges of how the message was sent. So when you’re sending bad news, the need to be professional and courteous is even stronger than when you’re delivering good news.

You should plan your message in a way that reduces dissatisfaction, creates goodwill, and improves or restores your relationship with the receiver. A general strategy for reducing the blow of bad news is to use an indirect approach. Here is the basic outline of an indirect bad news message.

Lead with a Neutral Opening

Unlike direct requests and good news messages where you jump right in, bad news messages should not start with the bad news. Instead, begin with something more neutral. For example, if you are notifying someone that they were not selected for a leadership program, you might begin by thanking them for applying.

State the Facts

In the next step, identify any facts, policies, or other information that will set up your decision.

Gently State the Bad News

Now it is time to announce the bad news. You need to be clear. But you do not need to be harsh. If there is any way to soften the wording of the bad news, you should soften it. There is a difference between, “We rejected your application” and “You were not selected for the leadership program.”

Acknowledge Emotions

Some bad news is only mildly disappointing. Other bad news can be devastating. If you can reasonably foresee that your receiver will have a strong and negative reaction to your message, you should acknowledge those emotions in an authentic way.

Close with Goodwill

Finally, close the message with another expression of goodwill. Thanking your receiver or offering encouragement are ways to share goodwill.